Tuesday, 17 April 2018


The entire social media is abuzz with the horrific news of Asifa rape and murder case. It has really stirred up people’s emotions and sensitivities. Their anguish and pain is showing up in how they are signing petitions, demanding justice and urging that the most stringent action be taken against all the perpetrators.

Honestly speaking, I feel very deeply horrendously saddened by this gross and heinous act, yet I could not bring myself to sign any petition this time. You know why?

I'm just not able to look into my eyes because I feel that as a society, as humanity we failed our innocent daughter Asifa. I feel responsible for what happened.

Let us hope justice prevails and these rapist are sentenced to the most severe punishment. Of course we'll feel vindicated, but what next? Will this really be an effective deterrent? Do you really think this is a solution, or will it just be the satiation of our own frustrations? 

What weaves the fabric of our society is the collective quality of our being, of who we are in every moment in our day to day life, in the situations we experience and our responses to those situations. 

The truth is that these so-called rapists and perpetrators have not come from another planet. They've in fact been quietly festering and thriving around us, amongst us, but we seem to wake up only after the occurrence of some extreme situation. It’s my humble request that please be willing to just consider the fact that we may be contributing to these situations, albeit unconsciously? 

I'm aware many of you may choose to disagree with me, but allow me to just put forward my perspective. 

Here is a list of some actions of ours that we may have been oblivious of, yet they could be potentially contributing to these atrocities and crimes thriving in our society: 

·       Disparity in bringing up our sons and daughters.
·       Not educating our sons to respect women.
·       Not teaching our daughters to respect themselves and their body. 
·       Making any statement 'Boys are....' / 'Girls are...'
·       Tolerating someone saying 'Boys will be boys'?
·       Girls /women being made to feel less or small.
·       Girls /women tolerating what doesn't feel appropriate. 
·       Choosing to keep quiet or ignoring when a woman is not being treated respectfully.
·       Women not even expecting / demanding to be treated gracefully.
·       Tolerating and even laughing at expletives mostly aimed at women- MC, BC.
·       Men avoiding their responsibility towards every female's dignity. 
·       Men treating girlfriends differently than how they treat their moms, sisters or wives.
·       Females being led to believe males are stronger / superior.
·       Men thinking they are a superior dominant breed.
·       Women not respecting / supporting women.

The list is endless indeed....
My point is can we consider making ourselves more aware of our mind-sets and actions?
Instead of just depending on the law and justice, what is it you, me and each one of us can do to make a big difference?

While judiciary is working at taking appropriate actions, can we be diligently participating in life with awareness, and responsibly working towards creating a society that we desire and deserve?